Practicing Presence
By Rev. Julie Yarborough
July 25, 2010
Luke 11: 1-13 and I Thessalonians 5: 16-18
her most recent book, An Altar in the World, Barbara Brown Taylor, one of the most well-known and best preachers in the United States, confesses that she isn't very good at praying. In fact, she's so embarrassed about her lack of praying that when anyone asks her about her prayer life, she talks about the importance of prayer or changes the subject, or diverts the conversation back to the person who asked the question, hoping that no one will notice the she hasn't answered the question. “To say I love God but I do not pray much is like saying I love life but do not breathe much. The only way I have found to survive my shame is to come at the problem from both sides, exploring two distinct possibilities: 1) that prayer is more than my idea of prayer and 2) that some of what I actually do in my life may constitute genuine prayer.”[1]
I suspect that if someone took a survey of this congregation,
the majority of us would say that we aren't very good at praying, either.
During one of my first few years at Christ Church,
I paid a pastoral visit to a young woman who was pregnant with her second
child. She recently had been put on bed-rest by her doctor for some medical
concerns and I wanted to find out how she was doing. We had a lovely visit and
as it was drawing to a close, I asked her if I could pray with her. She said that would be okay, and wanting to
be sure to pray for her concerns, I
asked her, “What is your prayer?” Her
eyes got really big and she got this scared look on her face. “Uh… I don't
really know any prayers,” she said. All
of a sudden I realized that she thought I was asking her to recite a known
prayer, Like the Lord's Prayer. We were both embarrassed as I quickly
apologized and explained that I should've asked, “What are your concerns?”
If you grew up in a home that wasn't very religious at all,
you're new to all of this prayer stuff. If you grew up in a religious home in which the prayers were rote, you
may be comfortable with the Lord's Prayer or praying the rosary, but very
uncomfortable praying extemporaneously. And even if you grew up in a home where
praying was a part of daily life, and you're comfortable with the concept of
praying, it doesn't automatically mean that you're good at praying now.
This past March, on our annual women's retreat, Caroline
Dean and I challenged the women to go deeper in their spiritual lives. We
divided the women into triads – small groups of three - and asked them to pray
for each other. This was really intimidating for most of the participants. Many
of them had never said a prayer out loud before. But by the end of the weekend,
the experience of praying for others and hearing themselves being prayed for by
someone else, was hugely transformative.
Developing a prayer life is not an easy task, even if you're
a pastor or some other sort of religious professional! Even the disciples
weren't very good at it – we know that because in our scripture passage today, one
of them asked Jesus to teach them how
to pray. In response, Jesus taught them what has arguably become the best known
Christian prayer in the world: the Lord's Prayer. Then he went on to talk about the importance
of being persistent in asking God your petitions. You might not get out of bed
to get your friend a piece of bread because she's your friend, but if she
persists in her request, you might get out of bed to shut her up so that you
can go back to sleep. In the same way, Jesus implies, being persistent with God
might get you what you want. Don't give up on God because you haven't gotten an
answer to your prayers. Keep asking, seeking, knocking. Persistence pays off.
Elizabeth Gilbert was going through a nasty divorce. After many
months of negotiating, with tempers flaring and lots of money spent on lawyers
and court costs, she was just ready for it all to end. It began to look like
the end was in sight, and although it was going to cost her dearly, she was
exhausted and willing to make a deal. The question was, would her husband sign
the agreement?
While waiting for her lawyer to call, she was driving across the
country with her friend, Iva. Bemoaning the situation she was in she said, “I
don't think I can endure another year in court. I wish I could get some divine
intervention here. I wish I could write a petition to God, asking for this
thing to end.”
“So why don't you?”
Liz explained that she didn't feel right asking God for specific
petitions. “Instead, I feel more comfortable praying for the courage to face
whatever occurs in my life with equanimity, no matter how things turn out.”
Iva looked back at her quizzically, "Where did you get that
stupid idea? … Where did you get the idea you aren't allowed to petition the
universe with prayer? You are part of
the universe, Liz. You're a constituent – you have every entitlement to
participate in the actions of the universe and to let your feelings be known.
So put your opinion out there. Make your case. Believe me – it will at least be
taken into consideration…"
She thought about it and then she pulled out her notebook and wrote
this letter:
Dear God,
Please intervene and help end this divorce. My husband and I
have failed at our marriage and now we are failing at our divorce. This
poisonous process is brining suffering to us and to everyone who cares about
us.
I recognize that you are busy with wars and tragedies and much
larger conflicts that the on-going dispute of one dysfunctional couple. But it
is my understanding that the health of the planet is affected by the health of
every individual on it. As long as even two souls are locked in conflict, the
whole world is contaminated by it….
It is my most humble request, then that you help us end this
conflict…
I thank you for your kind consideration.
Respectfully,
Elizabeth M. Gilbert
Iva nodded and said, “I would sign that… Now, who else would sign it?”
"My family. My mother and father. My sister.”
"Okay… they just did. …Who else would sign it? Start naming
names.”
Liz started naming friends and people she worked with. After a while people that she didn't even know
directly were signing her letter to God. Bill and Hillary Clinton signed it.
St. Francis of Assisi
signed it. Gandhi signed it. Bono signed it. Muhammad Ali signed it… even the
Dali Lama signed it. For over an hour Liz kept naming names and each time she
did, Iva confirmed, “Yes, she signed it; Yes, he signed it.” The signatures on
her petition grew page by page until she was so exhausted that she decided to
take a nap.
She had been in a deep sleep for about ten minutes when her cell
phone rang and woke her up. She answered the phone, still groggy. It was her
lawyer calling from New York:
“Great news! He signed it!” [2]
Petitioning God for help in times of trouble is one way to
pray, but it's not the only way.
Do you remember what Barbara Brown Taylor said about
surviving her shame about prayer? “The only way I have found to survive my
shame is to come at the problem from both sides, exploring two distinct
possibilities: 1) that prayer is more than my idea of prayer and 2) that some
of what I actually do in my life may constitute genuine prayer.”
Let's take a look at those two possibilities. I'd like to
suggest that prayer is more than our commonly held idea of prayer. Prayer is
more than the old formula that some of us were taught in Sunday school known as
ACTS: Adoration, Confession, Thanksgiving and Supplication (although those
formulas can be helpful at times.) It's even broader than talking to God. A
very effective and important type of prayer, often called meditation, involves not saying anything at all, but
simply listening for God. Psalm 46:10 says,
“Be still, and know that I am God.”
Prayer, at its very essence, is simply being in relationship
with God. There are many, many ways to pray, and that's good news, because if
we don't think we're good at one type of prayer, we can try another, until we
find a practice or technique that we feel comfortable using. For some, walking
prayer is effective – many find walking the labyrinth to be a helpful way to
get closer to God. I have several books about prayer that involve kinesthetic
movement and using your senses to pray (hold up books) Body Prayer, by
Doug Pagitt and Kathryn Prill; Pray with all your Senses: Discovering the
Wholeness Jesus Brings, by Lo-Ann and David Trembley; and Prayer for
People Who Can't Sit Still, by William Tenny-Brittian. If anyone would like
to borrow them, please let me know.
Many years ago, a monk named Brother Lawrence wrote his
thoughts about prayer down on paper. They were later compiled into a small book
called, Practicing the Presence of God. Brother Lawrence believed that
we should practice God's presence in everything that we do, turning our very
acts of living into prayer itself. By living intentionally in every moment, our
everyday actions, like washing the dishes or preparing food can be done
lovingly in a way that honors God. Brother Lawrence was a simple man. He wasn't
known for his preaching or for his leadership, in fact, he spent most of his
life as a dishwasher and cook's helper in a monastery. But he was a great
pray-er. He incorporated prayer into everything he did, with the awareness of
God's presence and love all around him at all times. [3]
Mark Yaconelli suggests that our goal is to “become prayer,”
like Brother Lawrence, who prayed without ceasing, or like Jesus who was so
centered in his relationship with God that it reflected in everything that he
did.[4]
When the Apostle Paul wrote in I Thessalonians that we
should, “Pray without ceasing,” I think this is what he was talking about.
Perhaps some of what we already do in our
lives can constitute as prayer. Maybe we're a lot better at prayer than we
think. There's always room for improvement, however, and a life of prayer
necessitates practice. God is in relationship with us, but we can't be in
relationship with God unless we work at it. I encourage you to explore different methods and techniques for prayer
until you find one - or several - that work for you.
Jesus often left his disciples and went off by himself to
pray. The disciple who watched Jesus come back after that time of solitude and
prayer, and said to Jesus, “Teach us how to pray!” saw something in Jesus that
he wanted to have for himself.
Brother Roger of Taizé has said, “The desire to pray is the
beginning of prayer itself.”
Soren Kierkegaard noted, “Prayer doesn't change God, it
changes the [person] who prays.”
Or in the words of Barbara Brown Taylor:
“There is more to prayer than the answer to prayer. There is
also the pray-er, who is shaped by the praying.”[5]
May we be shaped by our prayers.
Amen
[1]
Barbara Brown Taylor, An Altar in the World:
A Geography of Faith, (New York:
HarperCollins Publishers), 2009, p. 176.
[2]
Elizabeth Gilbert, Eat, Pray, Love: One Woman's Search for Everything Across
Italy, India and Indonesia,
(Viking: New York)
2006, pp. 30-34.
[3]
Yaconelli, Mark, “Prayer” in Way to Live: Christian Practices for Teens,
edited by Dorothy C. Bass and Don C. Richter, (Upper Room Books: Nashville), p. 286.
[4]
Ibid.
[5]
Barbara Brown Taylor, “Bothering God,” in Sacred
Journey: The Journal of Fellowship in Prayer, April / May 2008, pp. 22-23.
© 2010
.
All rights reserved.
